There is no number to the worlds that exist
All the universes that come to shapes and colours through our neurons
So many of them, that bang every second. Big bangs, tiny bangs, and crunches.
There are truths in all heads
But nothing matters more than story matters.
And no one really cares for heroes
We just want them, and then hate them for being saviours
Who do they think they are?
We don't need them.
Or do we
No we don't.
Or maybe… ?
We are creatures living between two signs of parenthesis
For a short while we run around naked and silly as crazy clowns, masterless puppies
Sometimes we want knowledge and rules
We look for books to tell us how to do things
When they do, we fear them
When they don't we hate them
Fuck we don't need them
Or do we ?
Sometimes we want to make things come true
Sometimes we don't care
But we are here it seems
Or are we really ?
Illusions documantaries say…
Quantum fucking jokes.
So we try, we let go, we try, we let go
Where to? We don't know.
We imagine witches, werewolves, vampires, shape shifters
We imagine richness, poverty, buildings and art
We imagine movies, and politics, and fun things, and foods and drinks
We explore the soils, we explore the skies, we explore our hearts and our excrements
We shed light to all corners of being we can reach out to
And sometimes we hide behind our own shadows, scared to be seen
We want to be loved
We want to be adored
And we dismiss all those who try to
Because if they do, they can't be that interesting
As if we knew what it really means : “love”
Four letters in this language, one syllabus, more or less in other idioms
It burns through our breaths and genes, and bras, and chests and tight little blue jeans
This one concept gets us all from one edge to an other
Makes us build and burn bridges
What a nice carrot stick for drunken dunkeys, right ?
But we digg this.
Then comes a day, without any preliminary announcement
Suddenly out of blue
Oh that unforgettable and bright day that burns your eyes and enlightens your inner darks
That timeless moment shows you everything!
Things you wanted to see
Things you wanted to run away from
And there is no way of unseeing!
Are you blessed or damned?
What's done is done.
And it brings all to life, the best and the worst that could ever be
Negatives and positives balance each other, and the stillness shows it's face to you.
And in the midst of it all there is this cocktail of whisperings that will not leave you ever alone, so present, so everywhere, so here.
Your senses catch it all
And there you are, for the first time ever, in one single world of all possibilities.
With beautiful babies, and lovers, and generosity, and giving
With killers, and rapists, and shame, and guilt
And you are an actor in all sides of all scripts
You lied to people, you hid things, you hit things, and you broke things too
You touched bodies, and you touched yourself, and you screamed, and you sweated and you cried too
You did sports, you played, you learned things, you took drugs
Oh yes… you cannot lie, you did everything!
You loved, and enjoyed, and tried, and made efforts,
You acted good, you acted bad, really really bad.
But then suddenly there is no good, no bad, no more, no less.
+ and – and =
There just is this being.
A big perfect 0
And you realize there is nothing to do.
It all just is just a great big “is”.
A snake that just bit it's own tail
Now that you know there is nothing to know
Your old self tries to tell you
It's not enough!
I read this whole book so there would be an end!
What the fuck it shouts trembling through your veins!
What the fuck…
A growing part of you kind of smiles and doesn't care
Well, that's new you say calmly to yourselves.
When you realize there is not one “you” but so many that numbers wouldn't suffice
That angry bastard (as it calls itself)in your head tries to shout again
That's not enough!
But you very well know that to that guy, nothing will ever be enough
Because it's a consumer, it's an eater, it's a big fat starving destroyer
As you don't feed him any reactions
It starts dying
It tries on you all of the ever human invented mind games
If I die, you die too, it whispers
But you know now, that there is no birth and no death.
There is limitless being that only changes forms.
The creature's masks fall one by one like Russian dolls
It's a sweet little devil you think to yourself
Sweet sweet nasty devil
Sad and beautiful in it's ugliness
You love it. You love it so much. As much as anything.
And there you go… there you finally find the true meaning of that four-lettered word that gave you so much joy and so much pain.
I love you says your silence
And it finally finds it's ending.
Enough is enough
It just is.